Those who know me, know I have been through a huge amount of change in my life. Sometimes it was something I chose, other times it was chosen for me. I’ve been completely broke a couple of times – once ending up living in my friend’s driveway in a caravan. I’ve lost everything in a house fire. I have been through a marriage breakup, become a single Mum and walked away from a salaried job to work and live on the road.
For me, change is a constant – I have reset myself so many times that it hardly features any more. Right now, I’m sitting pretty, a good job, a nice house, money to spend on overseas trips. This is a place I have never been before, and while it is nice, it could change at any moment. But I’ll be fine.
A few days ago, I wrote a few paragraphs on change for a friend of mine. She’s going through some fundamental change and is right in the middle of that hardest patch – when you feel like you have been kicked in the stomach and head simultaneously, everything that gave you stability in your life has moved and you feel totally alone. I kind of like the message, so thought I’d share them a little more widely.
When change is happening, sometimes the hardest thing to cope with is that sense of loss – of hopes, dreams, status… At times like these you have to be brutal in your stocktake of who you are and where you are. Once you know who you are, and have a realistic understanding of your strengths, weaknesses and supports, you can start to move forward.
What is your position right now? Is this position sustainable? Can you build your way from here or do you need to make some more, final changes first. It may feel like stepping down and losing a lot of things you have worked hard for, but you have to let go of that feeling.
Reset yourself, your plans, hopes and dreams. Focus on what is good – your family, friends and skills – then brush off your wings. You may fly at a lower altitude for a little while, but once you are steady again, you will achieve so much more than you previously dreamed.
